Thursday, December 6, 2007

I wear long underwear at all times

I was walking home from school today with some of my students and the village marshutka comes tearing up the only stretch of asphalt in tchala (about 50 meters) and who is behind the wheel but one of my 7th form students, Giorgi. With a goofy smile and look of unadulterated bliss barely making it past the steering wheel he careens past me and in my absolute shock and disbelief i fail to notice the large puddle to my right. Giorgi hasn't mastered avoiding potholes yet, maybe when he is 13 he'll get the hang of it.


Tchala Secrets: The music teacher once coached a contest on GeoStar, Georgia's equivalent to American Idol.


So I went to Tbilisi for the first time two weekends ago and here is a re-cap:

Tbilisi is drinking glenfiddich on the rocks in a bar called buffalo bills with a Georgian cover band playing dire straits. yeah it was awesome.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Conan O'Brien, the love of my life

Ok so i have decided to add a segment to my blog inspired by a great man of our time who i dearly miss, Conan O'brien. No, i am not adding a Walker Texas Ranger lever to my blog ( you know i would if i could) but i am adding a "Tchala: Secrets" segment. Yes that is right folks (by folks i mean the 2 people that watch Conan and have a vague idea of what i am talking about--Jamie Dawson, AKA laZer and ...ok maybe just one person) Anyway i learn new and EXCITING things about my village frequently, they are often midly funny or interesting so i will be sharing them.

"Tchala: Secrets"

I can take a real shower with hot water when it rains heavily. I have come to enjoy bathing in rain water and I do rain dances daily.

Tchala has a "cafe." It consists of two tables and five chairs. You can also buy phone cards there. I thought it was an abandoned building for a month and a half.

Many people have summer homes in Tchala and vacation in my quaint village. One of these people includes a Georgian millionaire who lives in Moscow. Don't start thinking my village is the Jackson Hole of Georgia or anything.

Tchala has its own Tbilisi marshutka...thats right, a straight 3.5 hr shot.

More to come...

Tchala, What What

I know its been awhile and I’m sure most of you have given up hope of me ever updating or making this blog mildly interesting but listen the Starbucks in my village does not have free wireless. Sure you can get a delicious double caramel mocha chip latte with half skim, half 1% and no one makes them better than Tchala’s baristas (Tchala= my permanent residence for the next two years) but god forbid you pick up a WiFi signal. Also I think the Banana Republic in my village has been pawning off last year’s fall line as this year’s new arrivals,. The nerve.

Ok, so what is my life really like aside from all my retail troubles…actually I don’t have retail troubles at the two “stores” in my village, because naturally the customer is always right. Enough with the lame jokes…I have been in my permanent site, Tchala, for over a month. I was picked up in Tbilisi, Georgia’s capital, after being officially sworn in as a Peace Corps Volunteer -- that’s right you can now officially say you know a Peace Corps Volunteer and rack up the street cred--by a family I had never met but surely would grow to love over the next two years. Scary. Luckily they are pretty awesome and buy me ramen and pomegranates. I have a host mom, Nana-34 a host bro, Beso- 13, a host sister, Teona-14, a host granny (bebia) Gulnaze- a youthful 65, and a host dad, Roini- 39. My host dad works and lives in Tbilisi most of the year but comes home occasionally for a week every few months. We also have a dog who didn’t materialize for a couple weeks after I arrived. His name is Paco and I will never touch him. Did I mention our cow? She comes home everyday at 5 o'clock.

I live in a village of 900 people and countless cows, chickens, pigs, donkeys --these animals have got to make the most god awful sounds-- and lambs. They all run wild-- yes, the people too. Tchala is nestled in the foothills of some mountains and is pretty flippin’ picturesque with a nice little river running through it. Tchala is located in the Imereti Region of Georgia. The Imereti region is know for its Khatchpuri (cheese bread type thing, somewhat like a quesadilla, that I don’t like) and its temperamental people, haha. Luckily I have not come across the latter very often. It takes about 3.5 hrs to get to “The Big City” -Tbilisi- and the closest volunteers are just a hop skip and jump of about 1.5 hr. Georgia is roughly the size of South Carolina but it lacks good infrastructure so traveling can be on the difficult, frustrating “I could get there faster on my bike” side but I am getting the hang of it and no longer eating before I travel. Most transport is via old school soviet buses or vans--think one of those obscenely large vans for sports teams or very fertile families. My village is about 10km (40 mins on unpaved road--yeah i'm racking up the sympath--did i mention i suffer from motion sickness? haha) from the nearest town. That’s where most people go to purchase perishables they don’t themselves grow and non-perishables at the bazaar (huge outdoor market---should be interesting in winter). People in my village are pretty self-sufficient as far as food goes. My family grows their own corn, tomatoes, apples, beans, plums, cucumbers, potatoes, grapes, onions and garlic--makes their own bread--raises chickens--and cans various produce for the winter months. Eating is a very important part of Georgian culture…to be continued. Pictures aren't posting, i apologize.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Hey Hey, Its me again! Just wanted to post my address so you can send me all those thoughtful care packages you are been thinking sending me. You probably even have the boxes piling up in the hallway.

PCV Jess Wallace
Box 66
Tbilisi 0194
Republic of Georgia

It wouldnt hurt to throw on some religious symbols on the many packages you will be sending me to prevent tapering and whatnot. That is all for now.

Sunday, August 5, 2007











Ok Ok, I have been really slacking on the blog posts but i just haven't been able to pick up a wireless signal in my village, strange.

Anyway things are going well here, only 3 more weeks of training until I go to my permanent site for 2 yrs. I will be sad to leave my host family and my great village of Kheltubani. I just finished up two weeks of practicum, which was pretty much summer school with the village kids. We planned four lessons a day in english for kids between the ages of 8-14. It was really fun and i learned a lot about teaching in general, especially classroom mangaement. I did have to enforce a "no wrestling rule" a couple of times but other than that it went quite smoothly. I even was asked for my autograph by a number of students, repeatedly. I am finally getting the celebrity i deserve and alll I had to do was come to Georgia.










This is a picture of part of my totally rad host family, Giorgi, Ledi and Lela (she left for of all places Texas for a student exchange program today.) This was taken at my first birthday supra which involved much bad dancing of both the georgian and american variety.







Below is a picture of my house in Kheltubani. It's a pretty sweet pad even though it looks like some sort of factory building in the picture. Geogrgian houses are like motels in a way. Usually two stories but all rooms are accessed from the outside with the stairway outdoors as well. This will make for fun times in the winter I'm sure.


























Now for the piece de resistance of my post...drum roll please....the cave city of Uplositkhe!!! My host family took me on a little excursion to this ancient cave city outside of Gori last week.





This city is high in the hills of Georgia making for some killer views of this river (its name i have forgotten but probably couldnt spell or pronounce it anyway) which runs the entire width of Georgia, from the Black Sea all the way east to Azerbaijian.






That is all for now, I hope this will hold you over for a couple weeks.

Sunday, July 1, 2007









As requested some pictures from Georgia:










All the G7s in Tbilisi after touching down in Georgia at 4 am.






















The soviet era mountain resort outside of Tbilisi we stayed in during our first week in Georgia and the location of my last western toilet.
Some views from our first digs.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Garmajoba Megobaris da Ojakhi!

Well I finally made it to Georgia safe and sound. Upon arrival at 3 am the volunteers were shuttled from the Tbilisi airport to a part of "old town" in Tbilisi to take a misvidobis korpusi (peace corps) group photo. We then went to an old soviet mountain retreat for 6 days of orientation.

I am currently in my training site, a village outside of Gori. Gori is famous around these parts for being the birthplace of Stalin and his face is everywhere. I will be in my villlage for around 2 months. You will be glad to know that I have perfected the squat and spend far less time in the bathroom these days. My host family is wonderful and I have a host sister who is going to Texas in August as part of a high school exchange program so she is very excited to practice her near perfect english with me. I dont know how she feels about me practicing my disasterous Georgian. WEll that is all for now, i am at an internet cafe in Gori and my time is running out. I have tried to post pictures, hopefully it will work. I miss you all but am having an awesome time here. No supras yet.

Friday, June 8, 2007

Blogmania

I have this sweet blog. One day I will have something of interest to write, today not so much. 4 days until I blow my peace fingers to the Lanc Lanc and everyone I have ever known. I can't wait to become violently ill when this finally hits me, probably somewhere over the Atlantic.